passions, psychobabble

Productively Yours

Statistics say that the average person spends 45-62 minutes of each day waiting for something. That’s about 4.2% of the average lifespan. Right now, you may be waiting for a document to download, for your turn to use the bathroom, for a ride to arrive, or for the right person to come along. According to a study on the psychology of waiting, emotions normally dominate the process. The way we feel affects our attitude about the wait. The more unpleasant the experience seems for you, the more frustrating and the longer the waiting period seems. And that’s the reason why Eldar, the Enchanted Kingdom wizard, has a job. Time filled with something else, other than the realization that you’re waiting, gives us the perception of a shorter, quicker wait. Holding your place at the amusement park queue is one thing; now, waiting for a person, a.k.a. God’s Best, to come into your life is another story.

I wonder, how would a new concept of time change our culture of waiting? After all, waiting is a function of time. At the risk of sounding too naive, I will say what I know to be true: God’s timing is always perfect. He’s never a minute too early or too late. In Ecclesiastes 3:1, it says,

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.

It clearly says that there is a right time for every single thing. As for love, it is written,

Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires. – Song of Songs 2:7

This means that until it is God’s appointed time, we are not to force the issue or attempt to speed up the process. In my own walk with the Lord, I have come to learn that there are FOUR MAIN REASONS WHY GOD DOES NOT GIVE US WHAT WE WANT WHEN WE WANT IT:

  1. An area of sin. It’s either there is an area of sin in our lives that He wants us to address first or what we are asking for AT THIS TIME may cause us to stumble in our own walk with God. This leads us to the issue of
  2. Unpreparedness. Sometimes, we are asking for something we’re not yet ready for. For instance, some of us single women in the church may be praying for a husband when our actions show we’re not really ready to be a wife.
  3. God is using the waiting season to mold our character. One of my favorite Scriptures tells me that “the testing of your faith develops perseverance (James 1:3).” In the same way, as we wait for God’s Best,  we gain wisdom and patience along the way, and these are essential for playing the role of a godly wife or husband.
  4. It’s not His will for us. This is the part where you leave my blog. LOL. Kidding aside, it may not be what you want to hear, er, read about, but too often, we want to be with someone who is not even God’s Second Best.

No matter how far along we are in our waiting season, we are given a model of the right attitude to keep in James 5:7-9:

See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains… Be patient and stand firm… Don’t grumble…

In the meantime, here’s HOW TO BE PRODUCTIVE AS WE WAIT:

  1. Get closer to God. The closer we get to the Author of the Greatest Love Story Ever Told, the clearer the direction will be. He is your heart’s Designer, and He certainly knows how it works best. As He knows your innermost desires, you can be sure that He will never give you someone you will want to get rid of.
  2. Rethink your motives. Why are you in a hurry to get into a relationship? Or to get married? If you’re just looking for a savior, know that you’ve already got One. If you want a way out of a lonely, dreary life, well, newsflash… There are married people who are lonely, because they ended up rushing into marriage with the wrong persons.
  3. Guard against getting “corned beef” heart. I remember the lines to the Bachelor Girl song “Buses and Trains”: So I walked under a busI got hit by a train/Keep falling in love/Which is kinda the same/I’ve sunk out at sea/Crashed my car, gone insane/And it felt so good/I wanna do it again. Enough said. Even if you survive, you bring excess baggage from the experiences that will burden your God-destined spouse someday.
  4. Prepare for the role. For single ladies, it’s time to perfect your sinigang or maybe steak and potatoes. For more info, refer to Proverbs 31: 10-31, please. This blog entry is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too long. Yes, even for me.

A final Word of encouragement:

Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. – Romans 8:25


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